Friday, March 1, 2013

When what you expect, isn't what you end up with...

The last blog post is funny to me. I'd completely forgotten about this blog until my sister told me I should start blogging again. So, I opened it up today and, lo and behold, I was reminded of the torment of nightweaning. A time I thought would never end... when I thought I would never get good sleep again. Gideon is almost 3 and has been weaned completely for about 6 months now. That process wasn't as hard as I thought it would be... or maybe I just don't remember and I didn't write a blog post to remind me!

Gideon is the most amazing kid- loving, active, stubborn, wild, snuggly, focused, imaginative, determined, inventive, difficult, adorable, inquisitive, sweet, mischievous, loud, persistent and so friendly. He'll walk up to strangers and grab their shirt to get their attention, he'll grab an adult's hand at the play place or children's museum to try to get them to come play with him, he'll grab someone's ear if he can reach it. He has amazing fine motor skills and can climb almost anything. He loves to help by throwing garbage in the bin. He'll gladly help pour or stir things while I'm cooking. He climbs into his car seat himself . He lays down without a fuss to get his diaper changed. He'll usually stop when we tell him to (sometimes he keeps running though).

But, he doesn't talk. He babbles and screeches constantly- so much noise comes out of his mouth every day, but none of it is English. He started speech therapy a month ago and has picked up some basic signs - more, all done, mine, help and he created his own sign to get me to take my glasses off.

Then Tuesday, during his appointment, his therapist suggested we enroll him in early intervention and get him on the waiting list for an autism evaluation. So, I've spent the past three days making phone calls, making appointments, filling out forms and praying. I turned in the paperwork to get him into the early intervention program yesterday and he has a referral for an evaluation at  the Autism Center at Children's.

It's not easy adjusting to this new reality. I thought, by now, I'd be posting adorable kid conversations on Facebook. I imagined we'd be doing craft projects together. That we'd be able to spend a day out running errands or walking to the park together. I imagined that I'd be starting homeschool stuff with him soon. I did not imagine that he'd be in therapy. I didn't imagine that I'd be enrolling him in a special ed preschool. Or that it would be an ordeal to have him out of the house for more than a couple hours some days. I didn't think I would have to stay in the children's room at church with him because he's too much of a handful for other people. I didn't think I'd be spending so much time reading up on parenting special needs children.

But, isn't parenting all about doing what is best for your child? It doesn't matter what I thought these years would be like. It's about doing what is best for Gideon. So, we're going to get all the help we can to prepare him for school and life. Whatever comes next, we'll figure things out together.

1 comment:

  1. Praying for you guys Emilie! Motherhood isn't ever what we envisioned. It's harder and much more complicated than we ever thought it would be but just as you said, it's all about doing the best with the children we have. Gideon is lucky to have you as a mom... Hugs :)