More nightweaning- a bad night, a better night

Well, good thing I didn't count on nightweaning getting easier! Saturday night (third night) was awful! We put him down, asleep, at 10:30. We both went to bed by 11:30. Gideon woke up every hour the first part of the night. Then, he was so upset about not being able to nurse, he stayed up for almost two hours. I would let him nurse, unlatch him and put him down drowsy. He would immediately start screaming and trying to latch back on. Dave would walk him and he would calm down. As soon as he would put him down- screaming and going for the boob. Finally, about 5 am, I couldn't handle it anymore and just let him nurse.

The fourth night was so much better overall! He fell asleep early nursing in the living room and when I went to lay him down, woke up. We ended up just heading back to the living room because he was so awake. About 10:30 Dave walked him until he fell asleep and laid him down next to me. He stayed put for a short while before trying to nurse. I wouldn't let him so he finally fell asleep perpendicular to me, his head right against my neck and shoulder. He slept that way for two hours when I woke up and gently moved him. Then, he slept another two hours before waking up! Soothing him any other way wasn't working, so I sat up to nurse him, laid him down drowsy and he was out for two more hours! When he woke up at 6, I let him nurse in bed a couple more times before we got up for the day at 9.

I found a sleep guide online that recommended choosing a 7 hour stretch at night to phase out nursing. So, we'll do the 11 to 6 stretch. After 6 am, I'll let him nurse in bed if he wants- it will help us both get more sleep!

Since we started nightweaning, Gideon has been taking much longer naps. I guess he's worn out from the long nights as well!

Nightweaning time!

Four nights ago, Gideon woke repeatedly to nurse and nursed for what seemed like hours at a time. He climbed back and forth over me to switch sides so many times and for some reason, I just could not doze off while he was nursing. Since he was a few months old, I've been able to nurse him while sleeping. But, all I could think about was getting him to unlatch and be as far away from me as possible.

After a horrendous day following that night and another difficult night, Dave and I decided it was time to nightwean. I really do not want to wean completely so we are just focusing on nighttime. Our game plan will probably change but I wanted to keep track of how it went, what worked and what seemed to make it harder.

Our bedroom is set up with a queen bed against the wall and a twin bed pushed right next to that. Gideon and I share the queen- he's usually against the wall- and Dave sleeps on the twin. This gives each of us the most room.

The first night: Put Gideon down (asleep) about 10 pm. I started out on the twin and Dave slept with Gideon on the queen. Gideon woke up at midnight and Dave walked him and tried to soothe him. I ended up nursing him sitting up, (I am trying to avoid nursing lying down so he will stop associating the bed with nursing.) He dozed off and I put him back in his spot. He woke up again at 2 am and again, Dave could not get him back to sleep. He woke up AGAIN at 4 am. Same thing but this time he wouldn't go back to sleep. So, I unlatched him, put him on the bed with Dave and left to sleep on the couch. Gideon fell asleep after a few minutes of fussing and then woke up at 7 or so for the day. He immediately wanted to nurse when he saw me, of course.

Last night Gideon took a very late nap so he was wide awake until 11:30. Dave walked him in the room for awhile but he just kept looking at me. I nursed him sitting up but he still would not fall asleep. So, I put him in his spot and I went to the twin (Dave was getting ready for bed then). Gideon tossed and turned a little and then started crawling toward me. His head made it to the twin before he laid down and fell asleep. He woke up about an hour later and would not take no for answer about nursing. Ijust moved to the couch then and Dave was able to get him back to sleep. Dave said he woke a few more times and he was able to soothe him. About 5:30, Gideon was screaming so loud and for so long that I was worried the neighbors would call the cops. I went in and nursed him (sitting up) for about 10 minutes. I laid him back down (awake) and left the room. I only heard him fuss for a few minutes before it was quiet. At 7:30, he was up for the day and I went to get a little more sleep in bed. Gideon did come in and nurse while I dozed then.

The second night was better than the first. I really hope it continues this trend, though I'm not counting on it. I figure there will be more really hard nights, but eventually, he will no longer expect to nurse at night!

Once he is nightweaned, we may end up moving the twin and queen beds apart and putting him on the twin by himself. Especially if he forgets that he's nightweaned once I'm sleeping next to him again! Also, if anyone has any tips, share them!

Shared sleep

One of the things I researched before Gideon arrived was cosleeping or bedsharing. Most people use the terms interchangeably but cosleeping is having your baby or child in the same room but in a different bed. We bedshare, which means exactly what it says. Gideon sleeps right next to me all night.

The benefits are many if it's done correctly.

• Encourages breastfeeding because nighttime breastfeeding is more convenient.
• The nursing mother gets more sleep since it's easy to sleep while breastfeeding.
• Helps baby fall asleep more easily and stay asleep.
• If you are separated from your baby during the day, it helps you regain closeness.

Dave and I aren't big people so our queen size has always provided ample room for us to stretch out. However, our tiny baby seems to take up way more space than he should. When he was a few months old, we moved our spare bed (twin size) in next to our bed. This way, if Gideon rolled, he'd roll onto that. I actually end up sleeping half on it and half on our bed when Gideon was in the middle (I switch sides several times during the night for breastfeeding.)

But, grandma is coming to visit so she needs the spare bed. We had a crib given to us (a recalled drop side crib) so we just took off the drop side and put it between our bed and the wall. It was a tiny bit higher than our bed so we had to get some 2x4's to raise our bed slightly.

I hope to soon be able to put him in the crib for the first part of the night and pull him next to me when he needs to nurse.

Personally, having Gideon sleep right next to me is one of my favorite things. He nurses easily during the night, he and I both get more sleep and just this morning I was thinking about how wonderful it is to wake up with him snuggled against me.

And, Gideon never has to cry when he wakes up. He stirs and I wake to latch him on. He nurses and we both doze for a few more minutes. When he wakes for the morning, he just opens his eyes and starts cooing or playing with my face. There's never any need for him to cry because Mommy is right there.

The Dr. Sears website has a page on ways to have baby in your bed safely. If these rules are followed, there is no reason baby shouldn't sleep with his or her parents.